I believe that before we’re born, we choose to come here to Earth, to this Life. We are sent here for a particular reason and we have a sacred contract. We know it when we’re born and we know it when we’re young, but as we get older we slowly forget it. Yet even as we forget, we are unconsciously drawn to situations, activities, and receive signs, whether we notice them or not.
A lighting moment is an enlightening moment, and through this story that I share with you, hopefully you will also remember your lighting moments that were enlightening moments; moments that have been checkpoints or reminders of who you are and what you're meant to be doing here. So if I could, I'd like to share my own journey to finding my purpose in the hope that it will help you reflect on your own journey, what you've been through and how you can link it all together so that it’s crystal clear what you’ve been sent here to do.
I left school at the end of the first term of year 11, and after having gone to five high schools, I knew that school just wasn't for me.
I was supposed to be doing something else. So I got a job doing telemarketing and became the best telemarketer in the company, and I was finally good at something. The reason I went for a sales job in the first place was because I had been selling and marketing dance parties and events and I knew that I was really good at sales. Next up I did door-to-door sales because I love people and I love talking to people. For most people, if you had to tick a box for whether you'd prefer to do door-to-door sales or die, most people would choose ‘die’. I found that what I loved most was having conversations with people and leaving them happier than they'd been before, and glad that we'd both met each other. So, I was working for Foxtel selling it door-to-door, and after many years of being the best, I’d finally had such a gut-full of talking about Foxtel that I thought if I had to talk about Foxtel for another moment, I would vomit. I found I was talking to people about Foxtel when, it seemed to me, what the people needed was so much more.
I was banging on the door talking to people, which is what I loved, but what I was sharing was the wrong message. I was outside of who and what I was. So I had an epiphany.
I was wearing the wrong uniform; I was performing the wrong role. Although I had had this epiphany that I wasn’t meant to be selling Foxtel any more, I didn't know what else I should be doing instead! The lightning bolt had happened but the enlightening moment had not occurred! So I quit my job, sat on the lounge for a couple of months and thought “what am I supposed to be doing with my life?’’ I was sure that I'm here to do something amazing; that I’m here to do something that helps people. During this time, the only job interview I went to, and the only job I didn't get, was installing shop front displays: I was sitting there thinking ‘’I don’t want this job’’, so I obviously didn't get it. Somehow I was trusting that I would find what I'm meant to do.
I knew that if followed my heart something would show up. Looking through the paper one day, a particular ad jumped out saying “we’re looking for success coaches’’
I wasn't feeling very successful at that moment I decided I should go for the job. The job was being a contractor, setting up my own business and becoming a coach for a personal development company. I sat in my first seminar and had one of the most intense lightning bolt moments of enlightenment, and this time they came at the same time! It was a feeling of coming home to who I really was, who I had always been, and who I was meant to be. I realised that it’s not about becoming someone else, but becoming who you are. I had to unlearn everything I wasn't, and get back connected to who I was and had always been. I started being a life and success coach and became very successful very quickly. I knew from that very first moment, when I sat in that first seminar,
that this was what I was meant to do with my life.
I was addicted to drugs when I was 16 and had been to 5 funerals by the time I was 18. I lost many of my closest friends to drugs or drug related deaths from car accidents, suicides or over doses. So when I was sitting on that lounge having no job and not knowing what I was supposed to do, I knew I did not want those deaths to have been in vain. I wanted to honour those friends and do everything in my power to stop as many people as possible going through what me and my friends had been through. I was so grateful that I'd survived because I could easily have been one of those who didn’t.
I had been to the edge of life already many many times by the age of 18, and it does sound cliché, but when you know your day could be your last, you live life with incredible richness and fullness. Still, the the learning had not occurred.
I knew I was on the right track, and I knew that everything had been leading me to be sitting in that seminar. I would be changing my life, and would help other people change their lives, and I could even change the world in my own small way. So my work, to this day, is dedicated to my family for keeping me alive, my friends who kept me alive and protected me, and is dedicated to all my friends who died. I made a promise that I would live a life of purpose, and make my life count.
When you’re on purpose it does not feel like work. When you do what you love for a living, you don’t feel like you work a day in your life. I was so happy to be teaching what I needed to learn because I certainly needed to learn it. I was the 21 life coach, my boyfriend at the time was under house arrest, and I was not feeling very successful. I even rolled my eyes at myself when I told people that I'm a life coach. Funny thing was that I was just really good at it. I loved it and could do it all day every day.
So in life, whenever you're faced with a life changing decision, I ask myself, and I encourage you to ask yourself the question: “is this opportunity my place in the sunshine, my purpose, my passion. If it’s yes, do it; if it’s no, don't do it; if it's maybe, look into it.
When you're on your path to finding your purpose people show up to show you the way: mentors and healers, and even people who seemed horrible but really had wings on their back because they taught me such valuable lessons about what I was meant to be doing. The rest is history: I grew a multimillion dollar business, became (much to my surprise) one of Australia’s apparently best life/ success coaches, and the best marketing strategy I had was direct referrals. So for me it’s very simple: when I’m not working on my purpose, I feel depressed, stuck, and annoyed, and it’s the most uncomfortable feeling. It’s like a metaphysical head-butt, and I get ear infections for not listening and migraines from focussing on the wrong things. When I do work on purpose those ear infections and migraines miraculously disappear!
You are in luck. I am a purpose finding machine for people. My purpose is to help people find their purpose.
When you're on purpose, you can never anticipate the ripple effect. Your purpose is your passion and your passion is your purpose, and you are living a life of service and working from a place of greatest good.
For you, you know in your heart what you are meant to be doing here. Your purpose is like a rudder on a ship: it’s underneath the surface guiding you on your path. In the next blog, Find Your Place in the Sunshine, I will help you uncover your purpose, or if you already know what it is, this will help you clarify it. Sometimes we just get off purpose and need to reconnect with what we're meant to be doing.